Saturday 27 December 2014

Getting Marriage Is Not A Noun But Is A Verb....!!

86th BLOG POST -->>

Sahrawatism
Marriage is not a noun but is a verb. It is not something you get. It is something you do. It is the way you love your partner every day. Every girl wants such a man in her life who would care of her who would take care of her like a perfect gentleman. This line was come in my mind when I was attaining marriage with my father of my daughter of my school principal at Bhiwani .Generally I’m going only to attain some marriage party of close one only but in this session I attained a lot of marriage with my father. Even it was first time when I attained marriage of my school friend where there were present some old faces of my school friends. And it was surprise for all them that I was in that marriage functions. One friend was saying “Bhai tu kabhi shaadi mai to jaate nhi kahin galat raste se yha to nhi poonch gya ho….!! Ha ha ha too funny.

   On 6th December, I attended a wedding ceremony of someone who is my friend. During night time marriage I was in Sismahal Banquet Hall, Hissar. There I found numerous guests- of all standards- from poor to rich to extremely rich people. Here I’m telling to all of you that what I was guessing there. Everyone came to the reception hall, without waiting for any other thing, rather than socializing, rather than sitting on the chairs present there, directly went and stood in the queue for giving their respective gifts to the newlywed couple. Just after getting their images snapped by the hired photographer, they headed towards the eating space, had their dinners and later on left the banquet hall for their home. With their family friends, they started discussing about how the couple were, how unsuitable they were, how bad the food was, how unorganized the whole system was. While listening to this entire thing, I remembered the faces of the parents of both- bride and groom. 

Sahrawatism

            Now took a look at parents of both- bride and groom. How happy they looked. How busy they were. For the whole time, they kept running here and there, attending people, taking all the details and asking for everyone's where-about etc. In any marriage function that I go, I always feel pity for the parents of the boys and girls. I feel that even after they give their 100%, they are being judged negatively by each and everyone. Hence I feel that marriage should be done without any breaking news and exclusive footage. I always feel that marriage is a part of one's life which is quite a personal issue. He/she is going to get involved with a new person, have to start a very new life, adjust with each other and create the whole world from here on wards by keeping each other in mind and their children. And yes, raising children in life is the biggest responsibility that one decides to take. It is not a bit easy.


           Someone has said it right “Beyond these stars lies another universe, you still have to clear many more tests in the course of love. So I feel that when the whole life has to be traveled with each other, and the pleasure in living together comes when the amount of money that inflows is always greater than the amount of money that outflows. Life of a person or two persons living together can only be grateful and satisfied if they are financially strong and they have the basic amount of money required to meet their necessities. Every penny comes with lots of struggle. Calling people at marriages in hundreds of number and then listening comment about what kind of a bride or a groom was and how bad the system managed by us in the wedding was, I think it’s better to marry in peace with no one around us. Just parents and very few important people whom we know aren't judgmental. Anyone except these people are just wastage of money. If both the parties in the marriage decides to save money for the marriage and utilize it for the future endeavor of the couple, I don't think anything can be a better decision than this.

              In a normal marriage, a girl's father at least spends 10-15 lakhs and a boy's father spends 5-10 lakhs. Why? Just because they don't want society to blame them. They don't want any accusations about their miser attitude in the marriage of their son/daughter. But the society will always give only negative points whenever the marriage of ours will be in the discussion. No one will ever talk good about it. Sad! But True! I believe that these 20-25 lakhs should be saved and be given to the couple as blessings by the parents or keep with them for their bad health that they would be facing in their old age. These concepts of spending and throwing money like anything for the marriage of the son/daughter is totally a void concept for me. I don't know whether my own parents will agree with me over these points and will refrain themselves from spending too large to handle but I will try my best to convey my ideologies to both the parties- my parents and my in-laws to save the money by giving me the girl's hand in a temple and getting the marriage registered at court. When Abhishek Bachchan, MS Dhoni, Aamir Khan, Hrithik Roshan, Sanjay Dutt can marry in a very low-profile manner, why can't you and I? :-) Think!!! Actually, it's about our parents to think. They need to think over this. Make them think on this.

Thanks.
Parveen Kumar Sahrawat

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